Aging is a part of life that some of us struggle to accept. Whether that comes from your perspective of gender norms and expectations, situational factors of where you are in life currently, or cultural implications laid out for you by generations and generations, aging can be very triggersome. See below a variety of reasons for anxiety caused by aging, and how to cope with them accordingly.
Acceptance. The first step in coping with anxiety about anxiety is accepting that age is inevitable. Is there anything you can do to stop the aging process? No. Is there a way you can go back in time and be [insert ideal age here] again? Not quite. Would it be healthier for you to accept, embrace, and acknowledge that with every age, there are new and unique life circumstances and things to look forward to? Most definitely. Although acceptance is easier said than done, it is a crucial part of coping with anxiety related to aging, and potentially the most important part as well.
Culture - be realistic. Coming from a culture in which every other woman is “20 years old (no, I’m not kidding),” aging is much more than just taboo - it’s avoided altogether. Personally speaking, the culture in which I come from is dismissive of aging in women, to the extent that women are out of touch with their age completely. Throughout my own life, I’ve tried not to let those cultural implications affect me or have a role in my thought process, which has been very helpful. A client who was struggling with accepting her age once told me she was watching a TV series, in which a 54-year-old character stated, “Who says 50 is old? We have 30 years ahead of us.” Sometimes, it’s the little things in life that really make sense and sit with us when we least expect them to.
Societal norms - choose your company wisely. As a society, there are expectations to go to college, get married, and have children, etc., all by a particular age. The truth of the matter is, not everyone follows this track record, and aging can be a real trigger for those who don’t happen to go through these rites of passage by chance. Surrounding yourself with people who are in similar situations, and are not habitual of probing into your life choices or circumstances will be very helpful for you going forward.
Gender - stay present. If you’re a female, aging is potentially affecting you more than it would affect males. As females, we do have a biological clock that ticks every second of the day, impacting the decision of whether or not we want to have children. If you’re a female who is struggling with aging due to wanting to have children, my best advice is to remember that it will happen when it does…have faith, either in your higher power or in life itself, and do your best to stay positive despite the circumstance…live in the present moment.
All in all, you may find that aging is something you’ve struggled to come to terms with for awhile, or it may be a newfound stressor in your life. Despite the reasons, Niyyah Counseling is an open door for you to discuss your worries, beliefs, and difficulties. Remember that you can turn to either of our wonderful therapists for support and guidance. We are a click, phone call, or text message away.