What makes a relationship? Is it someone to come home to at the end of the day? Is it someone we confide in and to trust? Is it someone to spend this grand adventure we call life with? Is it emotional? Is it purely physical? Is it none of these things or is it all of these things? Relationships and our ideas of what a relationship is have changed over the years. In our parents and grandparents generation, relationships were strictly between those of the opposite sex. A relationship meant marriage between man and woman and it most likely meant the man works while the woman stays home and cooks and cleans and takes care of the home. Today those relational roles have shifted. We have stay at home dads, breadwinning wives, homes with two dads, homes with two moms. Some even with a dad, an uncle Joey and an uncle Jesse. Full House references aside, our concept of relationships and family have changed over the years. This change has become more open and inclusive as it allows us to celebrate more than just one type of relationship. Open relationships aren't really that new. While it may be becoming more trendy, they've existed for quite some time. Marriage was already an established practice by the time civilization was founded in ancient Mesopotamia. But even Hammurabi’s code (a document dating back to around 1760 B.C.E) set forth a strict set of laws in the society, allowed for polygamy or open relationships.
So what makes them so popular nowadays? Well, there are a few reasons why a couple might choose to explore an open relationship. First and foremost, an open relationship allows for the couple to pursue new experiences and interests. It also allows for exciting and different experiences in terms of partners. Some feel as though this gives them the freedom to express different sides of themselves. Some state that an important aspect for many of those in open relationships is the idea that it relieves the pressure of one person to fulfill all of their partner's emotional and physical needs. Another reason that open relationships may be becoming more popular is the fact that not all open relationships have to be the same. One open relationship may look vastly different from another. For example, an open relationship can look like casual dating outside the confines of the primary relationship, for another couple it could look like pursuing romantic relationships outside of their primary relationship, and for a third couple, the openness of the relationship could strictly be based on a physical level.
Overall, there are many reasons a couple may look to explore an open relationship but it is not something to be done lightly and without caution. It is important that there is a strong line of communication and understanding before opening up a relationship so that it can be successful. If you and your loved one are considering an open relationship and aren't sure where to start. Our therapists can help facilitate that conversation in a healthy and open way.