Anxiety About Anxiety: What to Do, by Connor Cohen, LMSW

Anxiety is difficult. Anxiety about having anxiety is even harder. Not only are we struggling with the day-in and day-out of anxiety, but now even in our quiet peaceful moments, anxiety is creeping just underneath the surface. It's that worried feeling of the next anxiety attack. When we have anxiety about anxiety, the moments of peace and comfort are no longer moments of peace and comfort, we can feel on edge, we can feel as though something bad is about to happen,  and we can feel as though we are standing on a ledge about to fall in at any time.  So how do we cope with this feeling of anxiety about anxiety? 

Well, I think strangely enough it starts with anxiety. Examining our own thoughts and patterns in terms of anxiety can help us cope with not feeling anxiety. Understanding our own patterns and behaviors and thought process can help take some of the mystery out of what we may call preemptive anxiety. If we understand that certain social situations make us nervous or perhaps certain triggers result in anxiety, we can begin to better understand ourselves and that better understanding of oneself can turn this unknown of anxiety into a known aspect of our life. We fear anxiety about having anxiety when the anxiety is unknown and feels uncontrollable. To counter this one must simply start to learn about their own anxiety. It's almost like when we can rationally think about why we have an ailment, like a stomach ache or headache. Anxiety lives in the unknown. If we can understand that the stomach ache is from too much soda or a bad piece of fish and the headache is from not drinking enough water or staring at a computer for too long then all of a sudden these things that once scared us are no longer so scary. Understanding  the root cause of our anxiety can take away the sharp sting that leads to more panic.

Another helpful way to reduce anxiety about anxiety is the concept of acceptance. A lot of anxiety about anxiety happens when we don't want anxiety. That pushing away, the running from it, trains our mind to fear the feelings of anxiety. There is a great sense of freedom in accepting anxiety. There is freedom in acknowledging that these feelings that are so uncomfortable are simply anxiety. When we accept that we have anxiety and we accept my feelings and thoughts that come with it we can learn to live with anxiety. In life there will be moments when we're more nervous than others, it is a natural part of life and yet it is an uncomfortable part of life. It is natural to seek comfort and safety. Our anxiety tells us that we are uncomfortable and not safe. If we can view the anxiety as an overprotective friend then maybe we won't be so scared next time he comes around and just maybe we won't worry about when he's going to show up next.

If you or a loved one are struggling with anxiety, our therapists can help guide you on your journey towards coping with anxiety. Whether this is anxiety about having anxiety or countless other things that may give us a sense of panic, our team here can help guide you towards acceptance, comfort and coping.